You hurt so I'll sing You a song

i had already posted this put this is the final edit... after alot of tears and alot of pain i'm gonna let it go...



Hating herself for loving him is her national anthem. She wraps herself in loneliness. She breaks in sin. She cries in spirit. She sings in darkness. She breathes in water. She dies in him. A beautiful beginning for the most tragic of endings. The grave was built when she first said hello. He was kind enough to bring her pain and guilt. He was caring enough to show her sorrow and coldness.

Lia suffers in silence. And when she loves she suffers the most. Trying to find freedom in his arms she lets herself go. While her big brown eyes bring sadness to his world in which he can not deny them. Her hollow screams from within are a loud sound in his head. They are the opposites that attract and explode.

-Close your soul my sweet. No one wants to see your ending-, he whispers to her ear, -Some things should remain a mystery.-
-You were my unbroken dream- was Lia's reply.-I'm dying, please-
-You cry- he said.
-I don't have to share your happiness and you don't have to share my sorrow.-

He holds her hands and takes her to dance. So close to her he can smell Lia's thoughts. She begins to shiver in his arms. She hurts. He cries. They sink together. This is the part where they become a "we" with a passionate and poisonous kiss. Experience and thought are not their biggest accomplishments.

Lia is alone in this love. He is her inspiration and her home. He showers her with ideas that have no ending and plans that will never be fulfilled, as she just nods in approval to all his words while the tears fall down her cheeks. And she sleeps in a bed of pins and needles he so humbly built. And he plays the piano 'til she is safe in her dreams. And so she stays under his skin.

The last words Lia heard before she left were her guardian angel's -"Lia, my sweet, don't drown in life when there is so much left to break."- In her beautiful black dress she sits on the porch waiting for him to arrive. Today they wed. With her runny makeup, Lia gets in the carriage to start the rest of her life. Everything stops at the moment of the "I do"s but this is how it's meant to be. A man must find a woman, and she and he are to be wed in holy matrimony whether she wants to or not. Lia loses the glow in her eyes as they get back, now husband and wife. And what she expected happens, as the roses fade along with all his ideas and plans, the color of happiness mixes with the color of blood. All of Lia's dreams, stories and lust vanish for good. Forever is the promise they have made, forever dead in heart and soul.

Now she has conversations with the night because the day light just won't come. All she asks for is a moment of rest from their torment. To be in his arms and dream. Thinking that mothering would make her a better wife, and since the little romance they had died in the altar, he proposed to have a child, a specimen of their own. She looked at him, -I will never again find a way to make you happy-. He just turned and walked away. She loved him, she needed him more than anything but he killed her with the joys and eternal bliss of marriage. She did everything he wanted to keep him by her side. But Lia was no longer going to be a victim of his needs.

And the truth will set you free, Lia's truth smothered them to death. She lets his weakness be her shelter and she shows his dreams the ugly reality. Lia destroys his hopes and makes his guilt cry in shame. She is the disease that makes his pain gain strength. She is the horror behind his eyes. If he gives her the chance Lia will become the death of him. It hurts to know that her skin is his sin and her thoughts are the nightmares he speaks of. But Lia will kill the child in him and massacre his happiness without a second thought.

Naturally he tries to find a way out. Like in every modern day marriage he looks for redemption. But it was his choice that brought them together. She is a beautiful sadness he had to obtain. Now he tries to throw her back with the dogs to the world of silence. "There is so much left to break", he had so much left to give so she took and broke. "Lia my sweet you have destroyed him and now he has nothing. You have done well my child."-Her guardian angel, her demon, her true self was back and ready to kill the man who took her apart and turned her into a weak human being. From the ashes the Phoenix arises, from the dust she arises. Love is a poison but she has finally found the cure.